our soccer star

Elijah has become a huge fan of soccer, so much so I am tempted to call it an obsession. okay, if I am honest it is definitely an obsession. He now insists upon wearing a soccer shirt most days, and some days it has to be the exact shirt you see in this picture, not just any shirt with a soccer ball on it. He must wear soccer shorts, his soccer shoes (tennis shoes we call soccer shoes because Caleb played soccer in them), and of course soccer socks, "the big ones". He wants to have his big socks pulled up all the way to look like shin guards. He loves to play soccer, wear soccer, and all he talks about is soccer. If you ask him how he got the scratches on his knees from falling and playing in the yard he ALWAYS says, "uh uh playing soccer, uh uh, kick it, uh uh uh, fall down, uh uh owie, kiss it" He is hilarious and yes, definitely OBSESSED!

Needless to say he is having a soccer birthday cake tomorrow.

8 month update from Dr. Monteil

from Dr. Monteil (Micaiah turned 8 months old on May 17)

Hello! I do trust you are doing fine. This afternoon I had the opportunity to see little Micaiah, she has now reached 8 months of age and has been doing, according to the caregiver, well in the time since she was seen for the last time one month ago, her growth and development judging form what I am told appears to be progressing well, she is very alert and shows interest in all that goes on around her, appears to understand some simple word and turns to things that are named, she also imitates some of the movements she sees (rising eyebrows for example), is able to keep the sitting position and will try to pull herself to the standing position, I am told that she also puts herself in the crawling position. I am told that she takes her diet very well and is also receiving the ordered vitamin supplement. Upon evaluation today I found her affected by a cold mainly with nasal congestion, sneezing and minimal chest congestion, otherwise this little one appears in good health with no obvious physical or neurological abnormalities, her weight is 15 lbs 1 oz, length of 63.9 cms and head circumference of 43.7 cms.

these pictures were taken by the dr. at her appointment.

the sad reality of Guatemala...and our adoption

Within this post are excerts from the head of our agency. Although this was hard for us to read and especially frustrating to realize how much longer we still have to wait, we do feel a sense of peace in the midst of our adoption and are moving towards compassion for the people of Guatemala and their situation, especially Micaiah's birthmother, Heidy.

The matter of getting Heidy and her mother in the same place, at the same time for the interview AND having the PGN psychologist be present as scheduled and actually conduct the interview (because in many cases the birth mothers are turned away and told to return another day because of the caseload), is far from simple. Heidy and her mother live in an extremely remote area, at least 5 or 6 hours by car from Guatemala City. Even when it is not the rainy season (as it is now) it is difficult to get into the area by car. I have spent a great deal of time traveling in the interior of Guatemala, and I can tell you from personal experience that getting to the homes of many of these families, is no mean feat. Usually it requires a four wheel drive because the roads are either very poor or are reduced to rough dirt/rock tracks. In some cases, you can't get there by car or truck and you have to either go by motorcycle or hike in, often up or down a mountain face.

Prior to making a trip to meet with or bring in Heidy or another birth mother, the attorney has the contact (the third party who in all Guatemalan adoption cases is the liasion between the birth mother and the attorney), a local person who knows the birth mother fairly well, get in touch with the birth mother to let them know the attorney plans to come or needs her to come to Guatemala City. It's really a team approach to the communication and transportation of the birth mother in such a case.

We have to keep in mind that Heidy, notwithstanding that she has had a child, is a child herself. She is also Mayan, which means that prior to this situation she has probably never been outside her close-knit, remote community, and she either speaks no Spanish or very little Spanish. In the very macho Guatemalan society, women, children and the Maya are undervalued and seriously discriminated against. Although the civil war is technically over, the human rights abuses still abound and the Maya of Guatemala of every generation are living with a legacy of fear, discrimination, and abuse. It's hard to explain, but when a group of people lives with such oppression for so long, they come to be very distrustful and very pessimistic about events in their lives that they have no control over or that they do not have experience with.

So while I have never met Heidy, I know her in the sense that I know many young Mayan girls and women and am familiar with their situation. She is probably frightened, depressed, demoralized and confused about what she has been going through. You have no idea what sacrifice these women make to complete an adoption; often they lose friends, family and/or employment by taking the time to attend appointments for the adoption case. Sometimes their very lives are in danger if their family finds out so they have to do everything under a cloak of secrecy, lying and making up stories about where they are going when they leave their community (something they ordinarily never do) to go to Guatemala City for appointments. I know that my son's birth mother, with whom I have been in contact for 5 years, has to this day not told her parents about my son's existence because they would be so upset with her that her father would probably beat her, because even though she is almost 30 years old now, men in Guatemala hold that kind of control over the women in their lives.

Bringing Heidy and her mother into the City for days at a time may sound like a good idea, but you have to look at it from the Guatemalan perspective, not the perspective of our comparatively privileged American lives. Their family obligations or work obligations that they have, cannot be replaced by simply paying them for lost work time. They would be very uncomfortable staying at a hotel in the City, away from their traditional way of life, and as I think Aimee mentioned to you, Heidy's and her birth mother's ongoing consent to the adoption doesn't mean that they will or should be expected to consent to being sequestered in this fashion.

Some of the delay in getting the first and now the second interview accomplished, has been in terms of Heidy and her mother coming to the City, and some has been solely in the control of PGN ie them not following through on conducting interviews as scheduled. Initially, we were told the interviews were only being done on Fridays but they have expanded the dates apparently to try to keep up with the volume of these cases.

Aimee may have already shared this with you or you may have seen it if you read our PalmettoKids list, but the reason these interviews are being done (aside from the obvious reason of ensuring that a minor birth mother is making this decision without being forced or manipulated into doing so) is that PGN found evidence of fraud in some cases involving minor birth mothers. That sparked a huge investigation of that facilitator's cases and it means the attorneys in the Minors section of PGN (who have to review this and all other minor birth mother cases after the interview(s) is/are complete and before it goes back to the regular PGN attorney assigned to it) are overwhelmed with working on that investigation so other cases not under active investigation, like yours, are being delayed. We have another case with a minor birth mother in which the second interview by the psychologist was completed on Tuesday. The attorney on the case spoke to the attorney in the Minors section to ask about timelines to expect the case to be released back to the regular PGN attorney; she was told that it would likely be a month before it would be released from Minors section and thereafter it has to be approved by the regular PGN attorney and signed off on by the PGN director before it would be released as approved. This doesn't necessarily mean your case will have the same delay once the interview is accomplished, but it seems likely since the cases are at about the same point.

At no time since the Hague slowdown and eventual shutdown three years ago, have adoption cases in Guatemala been so delayed overall. The difference between that situation and this one is that when Aimee and other parents were waiting during the Hague, there was no assurance whatsoever that their children would ever come home. At least at this point, that does not seem to be a concern with the PGN situation, ie it seems that the children will be coming home but on a timeline determined by PGN and not by parents, agencies or attorneys. I know that you had hoped to bring home a young infant and certainly before the PGN problem we had a solid history of bringing home 95% or more of our children in 4 months or less, often much less. All of this has been unpredictable and regrettably unavoidable but I know this does not make it any easier for any of us - parents, birth parents, attorneys, agency personnel - to bear.


Although our case is completely up in the air and unpredictable it can only be a best estimate that Micaiah will not be home before the fall. And at best, this is simply a best guess.

update on the status of our adoption

An update on our case from our attorney in Guatemala regarding the supposed interview on Monday 5.21.06

"ABOUT EVELIN FLORICELDA TIUL (MICAIAH SUTTON) THE GRANDMOTHER WAS READY TO COME BUT THE BIOLOGICAL MOTHER IS WORKING IN A PLACE NEAR IZABAL THE NAME IS "LA TINTA". I talked today with the grandmother by phone and she told me that is impossible that the biological mother came today because is raining a lot in La Tinta and there are a lot of storms. So I will bring them to the Procuraduria this coming friday. WE ARE SO UPSET THAT WE HAD EVERYTHING READY TO DO LAST FRIDAY. "

and here is an explanation from our agency as to why they believe the birthmother interviews as well as PGN (our next step after the interview) is moving extremely slow since the end of March

I have heard from enough sources that it rings true, that part of thereason for delay is an ongoing investigation is in the minors section of PGN. It involves a number of cases from a particular facilitator (not anyone we work with!!!) and allegations of document fraud involving minor birthmothers. Apparently this is consuming a great deal of time and PGN attorneys are being pulled in from other tasks to work on the investigation. So, it still appears that PGN is only releasing a few cases a week, with not all of those being approvals, but the good news is that we had another approval this week! That's three this month and while that's only a drop in the bucket compared to normal, it is encouragingto see cases coming out. Hopefully the PGN director will be confirmed soon and will start pushing the cases through.

another reason we been given is because there has been the transition of a new director. (if you want to read more on the adoption process in Guatemala go to the right and click on Guatadopt.com)

...as of 5.31.06 we will have been at a stand still in our case for 2 months! (not to metion the 4 months of stand still we have already experienced previous to this mess) while our daughter continues to grow...

frustrated...

fun with the boys!

we went on another bike ride today, although not as far. We had hoped to bike to where the new property for our church is and see if the ice cream joint nearby was any good. Unfortunately, the bike trail was under construction and we only got as far as the UDF (United Dairy Farmers, for you non-ohio folks). They have excellent ice cream and the kids were happy. After our ride I took the boys across the field from where we parked to see the horses, while daddy loaded up the bikes and trailer. They loved and didn't want to leave. Next time will have to bring snacks for the horses.

just because.....she is sooo darn cute!

Funday

We headed out for a bike ride as a family! Peter put the bikes in the jeep and the bike trailer and we drove down to the bike path. The boys hopped in the trailer, and off we went. We rode 7 miles to a fire house where we had dinner. We stopped at a park along the way. And then headed back to the jeep. We all had a great time, tons of cute photo opportunities but we forgot the camera!!! urrrrgh, we'll bring it next time.


more pics of the adorable princess!

trying to slow down again

last night was the Ava's Hope (www.avashope.org) benefit conert! It was a huge success! This non-profit organization is helping to fund our adoption!!! they had a concert last night and it was a big hit! Very successful, especially for a first event for a brand new non-profit! Todd and Rachel did an amazing job pulling the whole thing off!

so today we attempted to get back to our lives again. We had a slow morning, or at least Peter and I tried for it to be slow. The boys woke up too early and were all excited and ready for Caleb's final soccer game of the season.

we went garage sale-ing (our city wide garage sale was today) and spent $1. Peter has been looking at golf clubs for the boys and we found 2 for $.50 each! The boys are excited, we'll see how they do. They really enjoying playing with their friends golf clubs.

then we were off to the final game. Caleb played a great game and was goalie for the final quarter, one of his favorite positions. Another favorite is on daddy's lap as a sub! After the game he got his first trophy ever! and of course the after game snack. I think he was more excited about the snack and juice box rather than the trophy. but that was okay because Elijah had no problem carrying the trophy back to the car for him.

This afternoon we are off for a bike ride down the bike trail to dinner! It should be fun!

It's always good to have some family time.

we're home

sorry about the delay in posting. we were having lots of technical difficulties in Guatemala and I didn't want to waste my time on the computer when I could be holding my precious little girl. She didn't want me to either.

Micaiah and I continued to enjoy our time together. She absolutely loves the water. We took a bath, she had sooo much fun splashing in the water and we even went swimming. She loved the pool!

She was saying "bah" "bah", not sure what she meant?

We found magic mirrors at the hotel. These mirrors are what allowed me to see her smile! So anytime we saw a mirror I would bring her to it and say "boo". she smiled and even giggled a few times. I wondered if the "bah" was an attempt at "boo".

Micaiah had a rough time sleeping our last night together, so we ended up sleeping together in that huge king size bed. When we woke up in the morning we had matching marks on our faces. Each of us had been bitten by a mosquito twice, myself on the forward, Micaiah on the cheek. I guess we just needed another something to bring home as a reminder of our time together.

Juliet (foster mom) and her son Francisco and Pedro (the interpreter/driver) came to pick u Micaiah Thursday morning. We spent the morning enjoying more moments together, we took another bath and had breakfast down at the restaurant. Micaiah even sat in a high chair that morning and I taught her all about cheerios! she loved them!!! she wasn't so sure about putting them in her mouth but she loved the taste. A few times she put her face onto the table to eat one up! I worked on teaching her to pick them up and get them to her mouth. It was a very enjoyable time together.

Micaiah fell asleep in my arms just before pick up time. I couldn't stop looking at her and taking the last few moments we had together. As soon as Juliet arrived I began to cry. I tried not to, but wondered when I would see my daughter again. I kissed her goodbye and told her I loved her and not to forget me. I would be back as soon as I could.

About the interview... well, yet again. it never happened. I guess heidy was in Guatemala City on Monday and someone went back to get grandma (she needs to be there too as she is actually the one giving Micaiah up). Grandma was very unwiling and hesitant and then they finally convinced her by Thursday and of course, PGN (where the interview is taking place) was closed on Friday. Now we wait until Monday, when everyone has agreed to come to the city and complete the interview. Not much to do but pray that this time it really does happen.

the NATIVES are getting tired

WOW, I am feeling soooo overwhelmed, in a very positive way! thank you so much for all of you who have been praying for us, we are so very appreciative and your prayers are being answered. enough to make me tremble, let me explain....

as i have written in the previous blogs, Micaiah and I are enjoying our time together, however this trip has not been as heavenly as our time together in Guatemala 3 months ago. Don't get me wrong, Micaiah is doing well, and not fussing, except when she is tired, hungry, and a few other times. However, she just hasn't been herself, not the girl I met 3 months ago. I think she has been in a state of "shock" for which I can certainly see why. She is has been meloncholy and maybe even depressed. I don't know if this is normal, however I anticipated this would be a difficult trip for her, so much so that I considered not coming. she cries if i put her down and doesn't even want to be on my knees, she wants to be snuggled in close to me. i love it! but it doesn make taking pictures and going to the bathroom a bit difficult!

earlier this afternoon a friend I met here, Linda and her mom, invited me to dinner with them. We all sat around trying to keep our babies content and enjoy our meal together. I was very impressed with Micaiah, she drank her bottle and sat content on my lap, with barely a fuss, until my meal came , of course. (i think that rule is in the baby manual they read before coming out of the womb). :o) Earlier in the day I had brought her up to a mirror in the lobby and almost got her to smile, but she seemed to resist. she just couldn't let it out. as she fussed at the table i brought her back to the mirror and attempted to cheer her up, she came close, but no smiles. i went back to eating and when she fussed again i decided to try the mirror one more time.

SHE GIGGLED AND SMILED!!! It was my daughther back in my arms again. I was so overwhelmed I ran into the restaurant to show Linda and her mom, they were ecstatic too, as they noticed her demeanor up and to this point. She continued to giggle and coo and smile at me as I tossed her in the air and gave her zerberts. my whole body was trembling inside. God has given me so much peace during this visit and yet my reaction to seeing my baby girl smile gave me a glimpse of what was going on inside her. I relate my demeanor here to two individuals whom I highly respect. My husband and my friend Shelley both have something in them that I want. Something about who they are, how they parent, their abiltiy to laugh, and their patience in all circumstances make me want to be more like them. More like Jesus. I feel like these few days in Guatemala God has given me the strength to live in such a manner (in regards to caring for Micaiah in these circumstances) I am grateful. I sit here crying as I think of the difficult time she must be going through and so thankful that I have been blessed to see the precious little girl I met 3 months ago tonight. ohh, she is so sweet and how my heart aches for her situation. I can't bear to think I will be leaving her again in 2 days and so I will end with some fun moments we shared today.

micaiah has been verbalizing a lot more today. she says baaaa, maaaa, paaa, i think that's it so far.

i read micaiah a book for the first time today, other than picture books with one word per page. she loved it, buenas noches luna ( the book was in spansih) good night moon.

at supper, Benjamin and Micaiah starting getting fussy and Linda said, we should get out of here, then natives are getting tired! i laughed and laughed.

today at breakfast as I was gathering my meal from the buffet, Micaiah began to stroke my arm as if to say, we are going to be okay mommy.


FYI: linda has graciously been taking pictures of us, as she knows I can't seem to post on here. if you want me to email them to you, email me peteandjocelyn@yahoo.com

Another great day

It seems that a lot of people have been praying for us. I must admit, we really need it. It's been such an emotional rollercoaster waiting for Micaiah. These past few days have been really theraputic for Caleb, Elijah and me. Here are a few pics from our day with Gramma at the zoo. We hit the dolphin show first. While in the theater, the sky opened up and dumped a load of rain. We were able to make it over to the cafeteria for lunch and figured it would be a short day. Minutes before finishing our lunch, the sky cleared and we had about 3 hours of beautiful zoo weather. Enjoy our pics! Thanks for praying.

we are doing great today

i just want you all to know that I have tried, at least 5 different times to post some pics. It is not happening. sorry. I think the sight is down because I am going through the entire process, uploading pictures, the sites says my photos are done and then when I click there is nothing there. sorry.

anyways...

Micaiah is having a much better day. she is slowly coming around. she has barely fussed at all today. still waiting for some smiles or a giggle, she is pretty serious. this is a lot for her, and I think she is doing amazingly well. she wants me to hold her all the time, which I love! she is taking her second nap right now so I thought i would hop on and try to post some pics, no luck.

we spent the morning enjoying each other, it has been a very peaceful time, sometimes she seems overwhelmed with my english so I have been trying to speak to her mostly in spanish. it has been fun! we went to breakfast down at the buffet, she was a champ. there is an adoption baby lounge here at the hotel so we have spent a bit of time in there with other babies, none as cute as her. there are sooooo many families here, it is fun, but a bit overwhelming. it's hard to remember all their names.

we are hoping for a photo shoot this afternoon, Micaiah has not been up for sitting alone so that I can take her picture, but I know she will get there, she is doing well.

i have given her lots and lots of hugs and kisses from daddy, big brothers, grandpas and grandmas, aunties and uncles.


confirmed: she does have one tooth on the bottom left, about half way in.

she is sooooo skinny, but continues to gain weight. she sits up really well, although when she gets upset she falls back, just like her brother (elijah). she likes to play with her spoon and the hotel key more than any of the toys i brought! she rolls over, but seems like a fish out of water when she is on her belly, she is not a fan of belly time. she is still has the sweetest softest cry. she seems timid to get too loud, wonder if she will stay that way after living with her big brothers. she slept so peacefully last night, and when she awoke she put herself back to sleep with just a little bit of fussing a few times. she enjoys being around the other babies in the lounge.

it has been a good visit so far. i am in awe of the opportunity to care for her and bring her into our family. this process has not been an easy one, but i wouldn't trade it for the world. i know that this precious little girl was brought into this world to be cared for by us. i feel honored that God has intrusted us with her.

speaking of...she's awake, gotta go

Road Trips Update

Greetings from gramma's!
We have been having a blast visiting with gramma and grandpa, uncle Chris, auntie Amy and the cousins. Elijah warmed right up to everyone except uncle Chris. He was a little intense for Elijah and Elijah was a little too sensitive for him. At the end of the day Elijah did give uncle Chris a hug and said, "I wub ewe un-tul twis."
Caleb made dinner with gramma and auntie Amy took both the boys to the park with Megan. They were in heaven. I got to golf and do lunch with my dad and brother - I was in heaven. I shot a 45 on 9 but the best part of the day was being with dad and Chris.
Jocelyn arrived in GC safely and received Micaiah at the hotel. Micaiah cried most of the evening. She has some significant separation anxiety. Jocelyn's hoping to have a better day tomorrow. Pray for them both to rediscover a beautiful bond.
Two other prayer requests. Micaiah's birth mother is supposed to be in GC to complete the interview tomorrow. Pray that the appointment is successful. Also, Jocelyn is hoping to meet Heidi - the birth mother. I'm not sure what that will be like but pray for God's will.
We'll keep everyone posted on the visit as we get details.

UPDATE FROM JOCELYN: Our attorney does not allow birthmothers to meet the adoptive family until the adoption is complete so I will not have the opportunity to meet her tomorrow. I will keep you posted as I here things about the appointment, don't know if that will be faster because I am here or not? I still wait to here from Aimee in cincinnati.

here we are, just the girls

well, I made it! arrived into Guatemala City about 1:00 and at the hotel by 1:30, no gliches. Micaiah was scheduled to be dropped off at 4:30, so I decided to get some Christmas shopping done. I went to the market, had lots of fun talking the Natives in Spanish and being emerged into the culture. i love it here.

I got back to the hotel and as I barely got into my room, the phone rang, Micaiah was downstairs waiting for me. Not really, she was asleep in Juliet's arms.

I was excited to see Micaiah and Juliet as well. Last time we met two of her sons, this time she brought her 13 year old daughter, Josselina (funny huh?)

Micaiah is as beautiful as ever. Juliet cut her hair, isn't she a cutie?.


(okay so I have figured out all the details to posting a blog picture from Guatemala and this dumb site is down-urrrrrrrrgh, sorry guys, I will try again tomorrow!)

and so far I have noticed one tooth, bottom left just starting to come in.

Juliet handed me Micaiah, or maybe I took her? :o) (peter accused me of taking her from Juliet last time -hee, hee, your darn right I am going to take her) she stayed peacefully asleep for about a minute and then woke up. She was good until we got to the room, then she began to fuss, I let Juliet hold her. I had a feeling our time together was going to be rough in the beginning. She is almost 8 months and experiencing both stranger and seperation anxiety. She is very attached to her foster mom, which I know is a very healthy thing. I am thankful. I spoke with Juliet, Josselina and Pedro (the interpreter) until about 5 and then I was on my own. Micaiah fussed until 6:20 and then fell asleep until 7:05. she drank a tad and started to fuss a little less, but still made noise most of the time. We tried a bath, but she wasn't crazy about that either. Around 8 she took a 20 minute nap and shortly after she woke up she actually looked into my eyes and didn't cry. yeah!!! we are making progress already. I got to take these few pics to send to her daddy, who is so sad he is not here. She stayed awake being fussy on and off, but not a constant cry and finally said good night at 10. Juliet said this was her bedtime.

it has been so good to hold my daughter in my arms. I am overwhelmed with a sense of gratefulness for the gift of Micaiah and the opportunity to come and visit her again. I feel so blessed and so privaledged to have been given such an amazing gift.

and we're off...

Tomorrow marks the beginning of adventures for the whole family!

Peter, Caleb, Elijah, and Bailey will all be going to Batavia to visit Peter's parents and spend some time with his dad. Jocelyn will be going on a four day trip Monday morning to visit Micaiah. (A friend has graciously gifted her a trip).

We are all excited for the adventures ahead... we will keep you posted!

sunday afternoon at the Sutton's

ICE CREAM on the front porch, what could be more fun! our boys make us smile sooooo big every day! what beautiful blessings from our Heavenly Father. thank you.

every boy loves SI

SPORTS ILLUSTRATED!

(at least at our house they do!)

fun with the fam

this morning we awoke and headed to our usual saturday morning event, SOCCER!

as soon as we mentioned it, elijah ran upstairs, wants to wear a soccer shirt and get to the game. caleb on the other hand, didn't want to go. he loves practice and has sooooo much fun, but he says games have too many kids on the field and he doesn't like to get in the mess. Interesting for a kid with the amount of full contact playing he loves to do!

caleb warmed up after the first quarter, subbed one quarter, played well the third, and really well while he was in for part of the fourth quarter. he is getting more and more comfortable with the crowd.

elijah and two other little brothers who are very close to him in age, all run around, kicking balls, and playing together. hoping for just a bit of playing time :o)

afterwards we headed to HOME DEPOT with our aprons on for Project Day. the kids made plant holders and had a blast.

Saturdays are always so much fun...elijah is now down for his nap, time to plant some flowers!

Happy Cinco de Mayo

We were hoping for yet another reason to celebrate cinco de mayo, however we received a phone call last night, still no interview. Heidy has a viral infection that has kept her from being able to attend the interview the last 2 weeks. We are praying she begins to feel better and is able to make the interview this week. our caseworker mentioned, possibly earlier in the week, rather than Friday? will try to keep posting.

PRAISE!!!!!!!

we officially booked a flight!

Some of our friends have so graciously gifted us a trip to visit Micaiah! Jocelyn will be going on the 15th for 4 days (it seemed a bit therapeutic for Mother's Day).

we are soooooo excited and grateful for such an awesome opportunity.

peter and the boys will be heading to Chicago to have some special time to spend with his dad. He has not been doing well lately.

we are all looking forward to our trips!